CFA

A happy update!  An actual update!  Had the phone call and we really got along well!  We're on the same page, it was easy talking to her, and she's someone I feel really good helping.  She actually wants to transfer two embryos, so the possibility of twins increases, but it was something I said I'd be okay doing.  But I'm getting a wee bit ahead of myself.

After the phone call I told J I was comfortable moving to the next step and waited to hear what my potential IM said.  There was a bit of a delay, and I was actually starting to get worried.  Finally heard back from J, and she said IM was confident this was a great match and so we were officially matched!  No meeting needed before making it official!  I'm sure we will meet soon, but I think given the fact that two previous surrogates have fallen through for her, IM wants to wait until I get approval from the clinic.

And speaking of that, I filled out pages and pages of paperwork this weekend for CFA (Columbia fertility associates) and will email them Monday.  I have a scheduled consult call on January 12th with a doctor there.  Seems so far away, but with Christmas, New Year's and Olivia's birthday party, I'm sure it'll come fast.

But I have IM's contact info so I am working up my nerve to make small talk while we wait for my consult.  I wish I was better at casual conversation!  Or any conversation. haha

Seriously though, I think this is the biggest update I've given so far!  Merry Christmas & happy New Year!

Moving on...

So my latest update is not one I’m too excited to post.  After months (and months) of waiting, I got the news that it wasn't going to work out with the IP’s I’d been potentially matched with.  

To sum up, in September they went through the process of retrieval and creating embryos, then PGD testing.  No embryos were good.  After some more waiting & contemplating, they decided to try another cycle for more embryos.  That took us through November.  So earlier this week, Tuesday the 9^th I think, I got a message that there was an update, and we needed to have a phone call.  I had a feeling that it wasn’t going to be good news.  So I guess when I actually got the news that again, no embryos were normal, I wasn’t shocked.  Granted, my heart hurts for this couple, because there’s an issue with her eggs.  Since they don’t want to use an egg donor, this is the end of the line for them.  They do have a child already, so he will be their blessing during this difficult and emotional time.  As I was trying to process this news, I was also told there is another potential match for me.  This time a single woman unable to carry a child, but someone that wants to start a family.  Talk about mixed emotions!  I want to cry for the couple that I was supposed to be matched with, but at the same time I want to cheer at the possibility of moving forward so soon.  The difference between these two is that the single woman already has healthy embryos frozen and ready to become babies.  So once we officially match, things will move forward at a normal pace.  What’s more, this woman had a surrogate but that fell through due to her history and not being cleared for another pregnancy.  So here we both are, having the other side fall through.  I know she is more eager than I am, considering her future family rides on finding a suitable surrogate.

So what actually happens next?  A phone call.  It all starts with a phone call.  I had the option of that or an in person meet-up.  And as much as I dislike the phone, I’d rather start there.  Then after getting those first few nervous questions and comments out of the way, we can meet up.  Hopefully.  I’m not going to get ahead of myself.  First, we need phone chemistry.  So Monday night we’ll chat, and then go from there!  I’m feeling hopeful.  More hopeful than I have in months.  This could be it! 

I’ve waited five+ months with no movement, barely any communication from anyone.  I was a teeny bit hurt that the potential IP's didn't want to have any communication with me while they went through the process of egg retrieval and embryo testing.  But now I suppose it's a bit of a blessing.  Still, I do wish I could tell them how sorry I am for them and that I wish them the best.  And to give their son a big hug for me.  But I think they'll give him more than enough hugs for themselves.  :)